Text of official Gubenatorial Declaration of Emporer’s VIP Day
I wasn’t able to get my hands on the original… but here’s the text:
WHEREAS Client 9 has been an Emporer’s Club VIP for nearly a year, and
WHERAS the designation of VIP signifies that Client 9 is indeed a major player kicking it in DC for the night, and
WHERAS Kristin retains the appropriate level of junk within her trunk, and
WHEREAS Client 9 cannot maintain a turgid state without a fist full of viagra and the freedom to call his partner obscene names, and
WHERAS Client 9 maintains that he is not at liberty to “smack it” unless he has “paid for it”
WHERAS the wife of Client 9 maintains that several of the fetishes ascribed to said client are inconsistent with her standards for cleanliness, and furthermore,WHEREAS said wife lies there like a sad sack of potatoes,
NOW THEREFORE BE IT RESOLVED that Client 9 will compensate Kristin at a rate of $1,000 per hour, plus a guarantee of “a bull ride she won’t soon forget” in turn for her services as an escort on
THIS, the 23rd day of FEBRUARY, 2008.
BY THE AUTHORITY OF Client 9, Governor, State of New York.
